Saturday, May 10, 2008

What to say?

I feel as though I don't have anything interesting to post lately. I have been so tired at the end of the night that I have hardly knitted a thing. I finished another little hat, which I will post. I have a sweater that's mostly finished and part of a second sock that have been languishing. I don't know why I can't wrap my brain around finishing these two mostly-done projects. I think I've just been under such a tremendous amount of stress that my brain can only do one thing at a time. Maybe two if they are both auto-pilot things (tv and a follow the pattern to a T project).

Why am I so stressed? Well part of it is money. I scaled back my work once Lindsay was born and we are feeling the loss of income quite a bit. Partner that with the fact that our neighborhood has become super-trendy (read...expensive!) and we are probably going to be pushed out of this place that I've called home for over 15 years. We don't own, so we are at the mercy of landlords deciding the rent. Our lease is up in a year and we probably are facing a huge increase. Our rent has gone up $300/mo in the past 2 years. We just can't afford to buy in Brooklyn unless we live in a crack den. And the schools near a crack den aren't very good.

Next major stress is the school situation. Here's an article that speaks about how overcrowded the decent schools are. Our neighborhood is insane and we're zoned for the local ghetto school. I've toured schools, become the president of the board at Lindsay's school (don't underestimate the power of the parental resumé), etc. to see what our options are. They are grim. The good schools are so full there basically isn't a chance of getting into a decent school. We thought that maybe we could have Lindsay tested for the gifted and talented program as a way out of our local crap school. Turns out they are going to put a G&T program there next year. It's a sleazy way for "failing" schools to raise their test scores. If you have one class of smarty-pants kids, they will raise the school's average test scores. The school doesn't improve, it just looks better on paper. Private schools cost around $25,000/year, so that's not an option. See stress point #1.

My father's cancer is back.

And my mother is such a creep that I just disowned her. Long story, but she's a mean, selfish person who has chosen to hoard money instead of helping her children in a way that her parents helped her. I've given this woman so many chances over the years to act decently, but she keeps choosing the creep option, so I'm done. Surprisingly enough I don't feel sad at all. Just somewhat relieved.

I organized a huge spring auction as a fundraiser at Lindsay's school, where I "won" two things. One was a 3 month gym membership. I have been going several times a week for the past 3 weeks. The other item I won was a stress management/relaxation strategies consultation session. Nobody bid against me. I guess they were either too embarrassed, or they knew how stressed I was and didn't dare bid against me.

I think things are changing for the better. I did a casting last week and may do the production on that job (good $$). The work outs feel great and I have the stress consultation to look forward to. Plus the weather is getting really nice. I've also decided that it would be fun to raise chickens, but that's a whole other topic!

2 comments:

Brooklyn Lindsey said...

Martha, I don't know you and the only reason I read your blog was because I have my name "Brooklyn" on google alerts...your blog mentioned Brooklyn and your blog popped up on my alert. To get to the point, I read your blog and it resonated with me. I like your honest writing and ability to share what's really going on. Thanks for blogging. I'll keep reading.

shansays said...

Money is a mind altering substance. And I think mother's are also. Ughh.

My mom inherited over $100,000. And managed to blow all of it. She's also been in and out of hospitals and institutions over the years. The frustrating part for me the last ten years has been that she's broke and asks me for money.

Anyway, it was great to see you yesterday. I have lost my knitting mojo a few times over the years, so I totally understand. I know you will be knitting soon.

Big hug,

Shannon